For the love of Snark
by Gajevyaddict
Summary: Hermione comes home and finds Ron cheating on her, rather than going into a rage she realizes how unhappy she is with her current life. She quits her job and disappears. When she reappears what does she find? Where is she? And what's to come? (I don't even know so read to find out.) Sporadic unplanned updates.
1. Chapter 1

**A/n: Okay yes I know I have unfinished stories already but I'm stuck on some of them, I'm trying but this plunny would not leave me alone and so I'm going with it. I do not have anything planned in any amount of detail. I have no idea how any of this is going to go. I never really do. And even when I had an idea of exactly where I wanted a story to go it has a habit of taking control and flipping my ideas off. So this will be updated when it is updated. I honestly have no idea when this may or may not be. I promise I will continue to try writing my other stories but sometimes I just need to step back away from the stories and it helps. So in the meantime, I hope you enjoy this Out of Nowhere, slammed me in the face, broke my nose, and wouldn't leave me alone plunny. And as always, I hope you enjoy reading as much as I do writing.**

She stood staring at the scene in front of her. She had come home early from work as a surprise and this is what she found. Her fiance was currently on their shared bed screwing another woman. A lot of things crossed into her mind in a matter of minutes. The idea of raging and screaming at him which was quickly left behind. The idea of setting the house on fire with them in it was another idea quickly ignored. It wasn't like the bimbo could use the excuse she didn't know. Everyone in the wizarding world knew she and Ron were engaged. All of the problems that would come from that wasn't worth it in her opinion.

After the original rage was out of her system she found herself struggling to care. She and Ron had been something that was "supposed to happen." It wasn't what she wanted. He wasn't what she wanted. He was still the same person that he'd been since she first met him in Hogwarts. Without saying a word or bothering the two on the bed she walked back out. She placed the ring on her finger on the table. She then walked out the door and didn't look back. With a twist of her heel she was gone, the idiot on the bed none the wiser.

As she walked back into her office she looked around her. Once again she was struck by how much this wasn't what she wanted. She hated the politics involved in getting anything done. Laws weren't passed unless you promised favors or money. Nothing was really changed. Bigots were still in charge. No one as bad as a death eater but she could tell that she was still looked down on by most. She flicked her wand and everything that was hers in the office shrank and packed itself into her bag. It was the same bag she'd used when they'd left to find the Horcruxes. She grabbed a quill, ink, and a piece of paper. "To whom it may concern, I quit." She then pricked her finger with the quill and signed the page with her blood. She banished the note to the minister's desk. Without looking around her she turned the inkpot into a portkey and disappeared with a whispered "portus."

She hadn't had a specific place in mind for the portkey. For the first time in a long time, she had let her magic guide her. Looking around she didn't recognize anything. She was in the middle of a clearing in a forest. She knew instantly it wasn't the Forest of Dean, however. She ignored the feeling of panic that bubbled up inside of her. Instead of allowing her mind to freak out she took a few deep breaths. Deciding that if this is where her magic wanted her then this was where she needed to be. She opened up her bag and summoned the tent they'd stayed in out of her bag. Frowning when it instantly appeared and set itself up she decided she really needed to go through the bag and clear it out.

Setting up a few wards and a strong notice me not charm she went into the tent and sat down at the table. She then turned her purse upside down. She watched in wonder at everything that fell out. When on earth had she put cat toys in here. Was that Harry's old wand? She shook her head. This really needed to be cleaned out. She vanished most of the things that were broken or unusable. Everything else she put either back in or away in the tent.

When her wards rippled she shrugged and walked out. She hadn't been paranoid in a while since all the remaining Death Eaters had been caught. She figured it was probably Harry. However, when she stepped out of the tent the words of greeting she was about to say, died on her lips. Instead, the only thing that came out was, "S...S...Severus?" And while she isn't proud to say it she then promptly fainted.

**…...**

Severus quickly caught her and rolled his eyes. Looking down on her with a fond smile that no one else could see and that he would deny if ever asked he simply said, "Hello to you too Miss Granger." Later on he would snark about her finding her way into his forest of ingredients, however, while she was unconscious he would let his real personality show.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/n: So I know these chapters are short but it makes it easier for me to actually write this way. Add on to the fact that it takes me less time to write them and you get more chapters faster. I won't ever short change a chapter though. I only end them where the scene ends. Anyway, this story was bugging me again so you might get frequent updates for a little while. We'll see how it goes. Thank you to everyone who reviewed! I'm so glad and excited to read reviews they are what we as authors live for. I'm so happy to see how many people are as excited as I am to see where this story goes. Because like I said last chapter other than knowing that this is a Sevmione I have absolutely no idea what is going to happen. So we'll be finding out together. As always, hope you enjoy reading as much as I do writing.**

When she woke up Hermione wasn't sure that she had been dreaming. That was until said dream walked out of the potions lab of the tent and proceeded to prove how very Professor Snape he was. "Miss Granger your ingredient stocks are horrendous you have almost absolutely nothing in the way of making a renervation draught, let alone pain potions, antidotes, or anything else in the way of anything actually helpful. What on earth is the point of even having a potions lab?"

Hermione huffed in indignation, "Well excuse me, Professor, this wasn't exactly a planned trip. I had no idea I was going anywhere, let alone where I was going. As a matter of fact, where am I? And why are you here? Better yet, how are you here?" She realized that last question sounded rather rude but, oh well. He was just going to have to deal with it. She'd just caught her fiance cheating on her, quit her job, let her magic carry her away and was greeted with him. She thought he was dead. As a matter of fact, everyone she knew thought he was dead and that irritated her because obviously someone had to know he was alive.

Severus arched an eyebrow in her direction if she were still his student this would have been classified as impertinence. As it were, he was no longer a teacher, she was not his student, and as such, they were technically justified questions. That did not mean that he wasn't irritated. In fact, that was rather a given. She had entered his domain. This was his forest of ingredients after all. He debated on whether to answer her questions at all but doubted she would leave them alone if he didn't. With a sigh he began the story, he explained how Winky had saved him in the boathouse and he had sworn her to secrecy since at the time he was still technically headmaster he could do so. He explained how he had absolutely no desire for what would no doubt be utterly ridiculous and totally fake hero worship. So he had left England and upon letting his magic guide his apparitions had landed here in some forest in Northern Italy. Seeing as it was rather uninhabitable to almost anyone and it was ripe with magical ingredients he claimed it as his own. As he finished his tale he couldn't help the snark that left his mouth, "Now you know the how and why of how I got here. How and why are you here? I can gauge by your earlier reaction to see me alive it was obviously not to search for me." The smirk that crossed his face wasn't exactly forced but it wasn't really genuine either. The little witch had worried him. When had she become a fainting daisy?

Hermione sighed, "No it wasn't to come to look for you. Though I'll thank you not to mention my earlier reaction." She huffed, "I thought you were dead how in the bloody hell was I supposed to react to seeing you alive and in my warded tent? Anyway, that's beside the point. If I tell you how and why I'm here I want your word that you won't say anything at all about it." He simply raised his eyebrow again, "I mean it or you can just simply deal with the fact that I'm here, not knowing the how and why. It's embarrassing enough without your snarky comments so kindly leave them to yourself." She didn't even attempt to go on until he gave her his word. It took her about an hour to explain everything that had happened since the final battle and what had led her here. When she finished her tale for the first time ever she thought that he had been stunned silent. That thought lasted all of a second before he busted out laughing. In turn, it was she who was stunned.

Severus tried to contain the laughter truly he did. But the fact that the brightest witch he had ever had the displeasure of teaching had dated the moronic Weasley and all because of peer pressure was entirely too much to not laugh at. The boy was an imbecile. He couldn't tell poison from its antidote. It had taken the boy four years to realize his best friend was a girl. This really was too priceless. When he finally managed to calm himself down he realized that he had stunned the witch as succinctly as if he had used an actual stunner. "What's wrong Miss Granger, Cat got your tongue? Or do you still have a cat's tongue?" He was not expecting the stunner sent his way and as such didn't have a shield up and was knocked unconscious.

Meanwhile, Hermione was livid. "How dare you! Oh if you weren't unconscious already I would stun you again! Of all the absolutely rude things to mention you bring up the fact that I brewed a perfect potion only to screw it up because I grabbed the wrong hair." She realized she was yelling at an unconscious body and as such sighed and levitated him on to the couch where she had previously been laying. "Serves you right. How the bloody hell was I supposed to know she had a cat?" With that, she turned on her heel and went into the kitchen to find something for dinner.


End file.
